He's Back

It is good to have Joel back. OK, so maybe I should have put a few exclamation points! It is REALLY good to have Joel back. We made it ok, but it was a stretch. :)
Today I thought I would give you a little glimpse into my struggles here in China. I might have blogged on this before, but I can't remember. Today I will also make sure to say one positive thing in addition to each struggle. :)

1. Time. I thought when we moved here that my life would be pretty flexible and I would have more time. However, as my time is flexible there is this constant pressure that I put on myself feeling like I should be doing something. So in thinking that, I have found that my schedule is too full at times. Actually my mornings seem more laid back but the remainder of the day and night just feels like there is not enough time to do everything that I need and rest too.

**While my time does seem very pressured, the things I am doing are much more enjoyable. I enjoy teaching and I enjoy learning more about the culture here. And although I have a lot to do I can be flexible about when I do it and who I do it with.

2. Responsibilities. I remember hearing about some ladies in the states who took cooking class before they went overseas. I also remember thinking, "I already know how to cook. Why would I want to take a cooking class?" Little did I know that almost everything Western I made would be from scratch....even sour cream from scratch.....pancakes from scratch....sausage....salsa....cakes....I mean COMPLETELY from scratch! That has been a huge struggle. One part of that is finding the ingredients I need to make it from scratch and having to take buses and taxis around the city to different stores to find everything. Long gone are the one-stop shopping sprees at Wal-Mart Supercenter. How I miss even what we all call "the crowded weekends." Every day here in the grocery store is a few notches above "the busy weekend" at Wal-Mart in America.

**However, some sweet friends have sent cookbooks, and that has been a huge help! I have learned to make some things that I didn't know how to do before--and I am sure it is healthier for us! And it gives me an opportunity to share with other people through cooking.

Apart from cooking, I find that being a mom is more difficult as well. I remember the days of hopping in the car and going where I wanted. Now, we walk out the door and all hold hands as we walk to the store. There are times that I wish I could just buckle them in their car seats and drive to Sonic or go through the drive-in at Walgreens. I am not sure why this seems more stressful, but there is something about never knowing what will await you when you walk out of the store. Will I find a taxi? Will I need to walk home? Will it be raining? etc. etc.

**However, I never have to worry about oil-changes, my car breaking down, locking the keys in the car, or trying to find my car keys every time I want to leave the house. :) I don't miss that!

3. Social Life. This has been the biggest struggle I think. I always imagined that I would come to China and find a Chinese friend and we would be best buddies. And many people have commented, "Well, at least you are married." This is true, and trust me--I am very thankful, because I can't imagine being all alone. However, there are times that I need to get out and exhale. And whether I would want to go shopping or go for a manicure, headwashing, massage, or whatever--it just seems really lonely to go by myself.

Joel and I also just miss having friends to play cards with, barbecue, or just have conversation with. So as we have opportunties to go out on dates, it would be nice for some of those dates to be with other like-minded people.

**However, just recently Joel and I met another like-minded American family--who also have 2 children. We have spent a lot of time with them already, and I am sure we will continue to do so. It has been a lot of fun.

4. Culture Craziness. I knew things would be different. I remember visiting a few years ago and someone sharing with me that they were really annoyed when people would always come up to them and want to talk. I thought that was weird and even a little rude, but now I know what it is like. I actually can 100% say that I NEVER want to be famous. I don't like the stares, the pointing fingers, or the people who yell "FOREIGNER!" I just want to blend in for one whole day. I don't remember what that is like. I want to go to the store and feel like no one is looking in my basket to see what I am buying. I want to take my children on a picnic and not feel like an animal at the zoo. I try to keep reminding myself that they are just very curious, and I would do the same thing. But even as much as I remind myself, it is still difficult to get used to. I mean, it has been 2.5 years and it seems like it just gets harder.

**However, this is also a huge open door to make new friendships. As annoying as it is, it is also a blessing. If people were not curious, we would have a much harder time meeting people.

Well, that is it for the blog today. Have a great week! We love you and miss you!!!! (The pictures this week are of the kids opening a package from some very special people. Thank you guys! And the video is about Autumn's "dream in progress"---it is a LONG LONG video.)